Wedding photographers typically have years of experience in shooting the special events within the reaches of exemplary wedding etiquette. While every bride is relying on the photographer to shoot the most amazing pictures of her life, she is also counting on him or her to do so inconspicuously. Most wedding photographers have this down to an art, and can use previous weddings as testimonials to the fine balancing act they do.
Most brides should have a wedding checklist of things to discuss with the photographer prior to the big day. This checklist will include special shots she wants to see, people she wants the photographer to focus on, and events over the course of the ceremony and reception she wants special attention paid to.
As with any wedding, there is a lot of preparation - for both bride and photographer! But a good photographer will capture some of this preparation as photos for the bride to remember. She may want to see images of her veil still on the hanger, of her father's boutonnière being fastened, the grooms tie being fastened by his best man. A good photographer will know the times and locations of all these events beforehand, so he or she is prepared to give the bride the memories she is looking for.
During the ceremony, there are obviously must-have shots that every bride wants. Shots like the bride coming down the aisle with her father, the grooms face the moment he sees the bride, the ring exchange - these are the most special moments of the whole event, and it's important for a bride to see prior examples of shots like these to get a clear and comprehensive idea of what kind of photographer she might be hiring.
Another set of shots that are practically a given are the posed shots of the wedding party and the families. These are typically taken after the ceremony, once the guests have left the ceremony site. A good photographer will take the bridal party and other special guests like parents to a few alternative locations that are especially beautiful backdrops: parks, center squares, gardens, statues, waterfronts, etc. Following these shots, it's time for the photographer to resume his role as a photojournalist - and let the happy couple spend the rest of their evening attending to their own party. The photographer should capture special candid shots through the rest of the receptions: the first dance, the speeches, the serving of the meal, the guests dancing, cake cutting, toasts; all moments the bride most definitely wants to remember, and moments a good photographer wouldn't even consider missing.
In any case, the bride should always have the power to dictate what shots she wants to see. A photographer, while an artistic professional, is still contracted through the couple, and should be willing to do almost anything it takes to get the shots the bride and groom want. If a photographer is not willing to accommodate the desires of the bride, the bride and groom are always encouraged to find a photographer who will - it makes for a better relationship through the whole event, and a more pleasurable album for the bride to look at.